Recently, someone told me this about how they met their partner. “I believe God brought us together.” I began thinking about this.
I am not an expert in religion or spiritual matters. I am not a Christian counselor. Further, I do not wish to offend anyone’s beliefs in God .I was raised in a devote Catholic home, attending church every Sunday. I have one brother that is a priest and another that is a deacon. Over the years, I believe I have matured in my belief in God and how God is present in our lives
I have heard that phrase (“God brought us together.”) before in my therapy office and I have said it before about my own life. I believe the person who said this recently believes what they said and this needs to be respected.
With that having been said however……… it occurred to me that such a phrase puts the speaker in a terrible personal/spiritual bind. If a person seriously believes God brought them together but they were to later decide to divorce, this would be essentially going against God’s will, which most people don’t want to do. On the other hand, if they were to believe divorce is best due to insurmountable differences but further believed they had to stay together because their relationship was “God’s will”, this could be the death of both of them and their relationship, spiritually and psychologically. Ever seen a couple in a “dead” relationship?
But, one could ask, what if it were God’s will that the relationship end? This thought further illuminates to my overall point…namely that one needs to be careful and think further about what one attributes to God or what is God’s will.
I do not believe God ordains who I am to marry or do in my life. But I do believe God expects me to treat others with respect (a.k.a. love one another) and do the best that I can in any situation I find myself in or put myself in; this includes any promises I make, including marriage. How then can I justify divorcing earlier in my life. I justify it by believing that I tried my best to make the relationship work and eventually came to believe it was not best that I be married. I keep that in mind as I go forth in life and enter new relationships and I hold myself ready to face God’s judgment about my decision to divorce previously.
Something to think about when it come to thinking about your religious beliefs and hard choices we face in our lives….like whether to divorce or not.