Sexuality/Lifestyle Issues

This is one of my favorite topics; usually men but not always.

Typically, I see a lot of men struggling with chronic patterns of viewing pornography, exhibitionism (exposing oneself in public) and voyeurism (“peeping”/ spying on unsuspecting persons in various quasi-sexual activities).

Other issues I have worked with include:

Couples struggling with sexuality compatibility, i.e., premature ejaculation; present interference enjoying intimacy due to past sexual abuse; lack of interest due to constant fighting, not setting aside time/energy due to work or children’s activities, a past (unresolved) affair; excessive alcohol/drug use;  and decrease in performance due to aging, medications or medical conditions.

Emergence of homosexuality/transgender identity or cross-dressing issues.

These persons (and their families) struggle with extreme shame, guilt, fear of exposure and their unknown future lives.  They desperately want/need someone to talk to about such struggles but fear judgment and this keeps them isolated.  Further, they need a safe place to fully explore their feelings/actions (i.e., how they developed, what in the person’s life is maintaining them, etc.), referrals to good information about such conditions and assistance in making changes in their life and in their interactions with their family.

More so than in almost any other mental health situation, the spouse and children often need (at least as much) assistance as the person seeking help.  “Am I not good enough (sexually)?”, “Why does dad do this stuff….How will I tell my friends at school?”; these are typical questions I assist family members with.

I have worked with men struggling with pedophilia (engaging in sexual activities with children and viewing child pornography) but typically these persons have been arrested and are in legal trouble. I typically refer them to certified sex offender treatment providers (The courts recognize treatment services for sex offenders from only certified sex offender treatment professionals.).

Change IS possible, with these problems!